My Experience at the Sierra House

Good Morning! I have been so anxious to talk about the amazing experience I had on Friday night at the Sierra House in East Orange, NJ. The Sierra House is a transitional house for young women and their young children who are trying to figure out what the next step in their lives should be. They may be homeless because of financial struggles, family issues or a combination of many things and the Sierra House is there not only as a physical place for them to live in but the people who work there are able to connect them with the people who can give them the information, tools and resources needed to help them get back on track. After reading about this amazing place, I wanted to talk to these ladies and give them some inspiration because I felt that they could use some positive words of encouragement to brighten their day. Before I stepped up to speak, the women all shared a bit of their back story as well as where they were in their lives now and I was in awe. many of these women have been raped, molested and abused by family members and others close to them and still found something inside them that gave them the power to fight and overcome the darkness from their past. Most of these women had small children and they explained that their children were their motivation to want better in their lives. Needless to say, I was blown away and was hesitant to speak because even though I had been through many things in my life, I had never had to deal with that type of pain and betrayal from people I trusted. I then told myself to get over it because this wasn’t about me.I was here to connect with these women and to show them that having confidence in themselves is the foundation on which everything else stands.

 I shared personal stories with them from my childhood that affected the way I viewed myself as well as what I did to overcome these issues. The women were so receptive and sweet and asked me many questions about my site and my goals and it was in that moment where I realized that even though I came to talk to these women and encourage them, their attitude and positive outlook on life has opened my eyes and made me appreciate everything that made me who I am today. They touched my heart and I am so thankful that I was able to have this experience because I want to continue to learn and grow not only as a businesswoman but as a person.  I definitely plan on going back really soon and I want everyone who comes to “Amore Luxe” to know that even though I want to be successful and famous in the entertainment field, my number one goal is to connect with others and help each other by sharing our life experiences and my experience at the “Sierra House” showed that this goal is attainable and priceless.

I want to thank Keely Freeman who is the founder of Sierra House, Tanya Taylor who is a coordinator and social worker at Sierra House , Angela Daniels, my publicist who was the one who told me about this amazing place and finally, a HUGE thank you to all the ladies that shared their experiences with me and opened up their hearts to listen to me and hear my story. Words can’t describe how grateful I am to have been in your presence and I can’t wait to come back to talk to all of you again:)

To donate, volunteer or for general information about the Sierra House, make sure you check out www.sierrahouse.org

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Me with one of the cutest babies at the Sierra House

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Not sure what we were talking about but I know I was passionate about it because of my hands!

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Listening to one of the ladies talk about her experiences

Always remember to love and live luxuriously!

Cake

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“They say you can’t have cake and eat it too, but ain’t that what you posed to do?’

Trey Songz-Cake

I have listened to “Cake” by Trey Songz for the past couple of weeks (very catchy song btw) and the line quoted above comes from the famous saying “You can’t have your cake and eat it too.” I always took that as meaning that you can’t have it all but isn’t that the point of life? We want it all and who is to tell us that we can’t have it all if we are deserving of it?  The thing is that what we want changes with time and experience. For example, I always wanted to be successful in the entertainment  business and I told myself that I would work behind the scenes to achieve my goal. Over time though, I wasn’t content with being in the background. I wanted to be wealthy and be seen because I wanted my voice to be heard. Some people may think that its asking for too much but I feel like if I really want something and put the work in, it is attainable. On top of all that, I want to give back and help others that are struggling  to find themselves and their place in this world. So many people sacrifice their dreams to make others happy or because they feel like they have to settle for mediocrity but I want to eat all my cake dammit! I do want to be famous and wealthy but I want my contribution to the lives of others to outweigh all of that. Difficult isn’t impossible and I have seen others before me have their cake (look at Oprah!) so I will continue to be motivated to push towards my goals.

Now having your cake and eating it too can come with a price. I don’t condone cheating in any form. The cheater wants it all from 2 or more people (maybe sex from one person, good conversation from another, money etc.)  and the one that is being cheated on may or may not be aware that the other person isn’t completely committed to them. I feel like in these cases, you have to make a choice. In Tyler Perry’s film “Why Did I Get Married”, it was called the 80/20 rule. So many people forget about the 80 percent that they already have while looking for the 20 percent that they want. When they finally have it, the reward isn’t as sweet as it was thought to be. In other words, that luscious red velvet cake that once looked so appealing in the window turned out to be stale when you actually got to have a taste of it!

The moral of this post: You can have your cake and eat it too but make sure you are aware of the consequences that can come with wanting it all!

 

Always remember to love and live luxuriously!

Insanity

“The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.”

Albert Einstein

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Every time I would hear/read this quote, I thought to myself how much sense it made but never applied it in my life. Last week however, I had an” insanity” moment. There I was sitting in my room with the guy I have been dating for the past 3 years when it hit me . Nothing was changing in our relationship even though I wanted it to and I realized its because I looked at the situation solely from my point of view and feeling trapped because of my emotions instead of looking at the situation fromanother perspective and seeing it for what it really was. I have said time and time again that you can’t change someone’s behaviors to make them think/act the way you see fit. I believed this but yet I kept behaving the same way hoping that things would change and would become super frustrated/irritated when they didn’t. After he left, a light bulb of sorts clicked on in my head and I said that I can’t keep doing this to myself so I have to be the one to change. No matter what happens, I need to be true to myself and what I want out of life. I hadn’t been doing that because I put someone else’s needs/desires before my own. Being selfless isn’t necessarily a bad thing but when you lose yourself in the process, it is time to take a step back and reevaluate the situations and choices that you have made. I told myself from that moment, I would fall back from our situation for a bit and do what I felt was best for me.

I needed a break from us and instead of being predictable (always being available when he called/texted) I would take the time out to figure out what I really wanted and make it clear that I would no longer continue to settle to appease him. I also told myself that I would be more open to meeting new people instead of putting more effort and energy into a situation that had me in a stagnant place. I don’t want to jump into anything serious but I just want to let things happen naturally. When I am so wrapped up in a situation, its hard to see any other outcome besides the one I want and when things don’t work out the way I planned, I tend to feel like I failed. I am trying to look at my so-called “failures” as lessons that I can take with me along this journey that is life. I know with every misstep I take, I am being directed on the path that will bring me love, success and happiness. I have to allow positive change to guide me and stop being so resistant to the unknown. I am not sure what will happen with me and the guy but I know that I can’t let fear of failure be the reason that I am willing to fight for someone and something that may not be worth fighting for. If I allow that to happen, my life will be the epitome of insanity and I don’t have time for it:) I have to continue to make moves and this week and this post is the first step!  Much love to you all and I hope everyone has a great week:)

Always remember to love and live luxuriously!

The Power of Makeup

Last week was a sick/lazy week for me so I really didn’t have the energy or inspiration to write.  Yesterday I wanted to write a blog post about one of my biggest fears (which I intend to talk about tomorrow) but then I saw this video and I was instantly intrigued. I loved how this makeup artist described her clients beauty, even though they could not see it for themselves. As someone who is hired to enhance a person’s best features and minimize what one considers a flaw, I was blown away at how she can make someone feel like they are on top of the world with just a few brush strokes. The point and power of her message is much deeper than makeup and although she is a professional makeup artist, her true talent is giving confidence and hope to others who may have lost both throughout life’s journey. Watch the video below and let me know what you think of her message!

Always remember to love and live luxuriously!