Motivation Monday: Best Case Scenario

Good Morning! The topic of today’s post came to me kind of suddenly but not really because it’s been on my mind for awhile now but I wasn’t sure how to articulate my thoughts into a comprehensible post. I had a long phone chat with my friend Kimmy over the weekend (hey girl!) and we were talking about how our thoughts and words carry so much weight and that you have to be careful yet intentional with how you think and what you say. Thoughts and words have power and you attract what you put out into the world (law of attraction and all of that!) so be mindful of what you say and do. I realize that even though I may say I want things to be a certain way, my thoughts do not match my words and as a result, the actions behind those words do not usually come to fruition. I always thought that it was solely based on my lack of confidence at times but after reflecting on our conversation as well as a previous conversation with my therapist, I finally figured out what the issue was that was holding me back from greatness and what needed to change in order to let go and move forward.

After talking to my therapist a few weeks back, I realized that I have a tendency to ‘catastrophize’ everything. By catastrophize, I mean that I always think about the worst things that can happen in every situation. If I go on a job interview, I think “What if I can’t demonstrate that I am the ideal candidate for the position?” or “What if I appear to be incompetent?” I’ve done in in the past when dating especially when things didn’t go my way. I’d think to myself, “What if he leaves as a result of our argument?” I always think about the ‘worst case scenario’ and that pessimism seems to linger in various parts of my life. I realize that my mother is the queen of catastrophizing and even though I know that many disappointing moments in her life have led her to always think the worst about people and situations, I also feel that her negative thoughts attract negative emotions and as a result, it is a never ending cycle of dread and fear. Some of those behaviors have trickled down to me and although I am not as pessimistic as my mother, I know that when bad things do happen, I have a tendency to let them consume me instead of dealing with my emotions in that moment but allowing them to pass and learn from what mistakes have occurred. My biggest fears are my fear of failure and fear of death and although I cannot control the latter, I can deal with my fear of failure by changing my perspective, Instead of seeing a failed job interview as a failure or loss, I can use the situation as a learning experience on what not to do. Instead of being fearful of losing someone I really care about based off of an argument, I should focus on the honesty of my words and never to minimize my thoughts or feelings even if it means losing someone in the process. If we aren’t able to get past the argument, that in itself should tell me all that I need to know. In other words, instead of thinking about the ‘worst case scenario’, I needed to shift my thinking to the ‘best case scenario’ and let my actions follow suit.

By thinking about the ‘best case scenario’, I will enter a situation with a positive mindset because I will be able to see the bright side of any outcome and use it to push me closer to my goals instead of seeing the experience as another way of holding me back. There are many things that are out of my control but I can control the way I view the situation and most importantly, how I respond to it. I’m going to try this ‘Best Case Scenario’ mindset approach and I will be sure to let you  know how it goes. I believe that it’s definitely going to improve my life going forward 😉 (see what I did there!)

What do you do to ‘decatastrophize’ a situation? I’d love to hear your thoughts on this so leave them in the comments below or on my social media (IG:@amoreluxe_ FB: Angela Cherai) so I can learn a few things from you guys! My next post should be up on Wednesday but if not then, I’ll definitely have something for you on Friday. I hope everyone has an amazing week and until the next time, always remember to love and live luxuriously!

The Power of Positive Thinking

Positive thinking 1Every year, I tell myself that things will be different as far as the way I look at situations. I would always say the Maya Angelou quote “If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude” to myself and live life through that perspective. I realize that it is easier said than done and when things go badly, I am quick to resort to the old patterns and behaviors. I tend to let negative situations consume me and while I end up getting out of the rut eventually, I end up feeling emotionally drained and have to work harder to put the pieces back together. Two of my goals at the beginning of the year were to start working out and start meditating so I would be able to strengthen my physical and mental state of being. I worked out at home at the beginning of January and went to 2 yoga classes in April before I lost interest in each activity. I knew why I lost interest in working out (I wasn’t ready mentally) but yoga was something that was supposed to help the mind, body and soul and I enjoyed the classes I went to but that spark that I had at the beginning of the sessions faded away as weeks went by. I let other issues caused by things out of my control bring me down and take away my passion for Yoga and anything else that would be a positive influence or change in my life.

I had an epiphany last night while thinking about what to write today and wanted to share it with all of you. As much as I want to work out and be fit, I first need to work on my mental and spiritual state and I want to start by reading books that will motivate, enlighten and encourage me. I plan on reading “Super Rich” by Russell Simmons( which I have had for years now and never got around to reading it) and finish reading “The Art of Seduction” by Robert Greene.  I will also look to others who have faced adversity and come out on top. I feel that Oprah is definitely one of those people who have been a positive influence on my life. I am so excited about going to her  “The Life You Want” tour in September because I feel that being around like-minded people and hearing one of my inspirations speak about bringing positive energy into your  life will uplift my spirits. I also promised myself that I would continue with Yoga because I felt better about myself and my life after leaving the classes and I won’t let anyone or anything get in the way of that. Last but not least, I want to speak positive quotes and affirmations into my life every day especially when I am feeling down and out. I feel that these things will improve my mental and spiritual state and when you feel good internally, I feel that the external will follow. If you have any quotes, affirmations or tips on positive thinking, post them here and I’ll share some of mine throughout the week. Much love and happiness to all of you!

Remember to Love and Live Luxuriously!