Fear vs. Faith

fear6Good Afternoon! I’ve racked my brain all weekend trying to figure out what to write about. I had a few ideas in my head but none of them were about anything that really resonated with me. If I didn’t feel strongly about it, I knew that would come through in my writing so I told myself I wouldn’t write unless it would be beneficial to myself and others. Even if its something that I’m uncomfortable with, I’d write about it because I know that I could speak for those who may not have the courage now to talk about what bothers them. Although I am working on my confidence, there has always been one thing that I never felt confident doing even after I faced my biggest fear related to it: Driving.

I didn’t get my license until I was 29 (at the end of last year) and that was because I was scared to drive on the road with others because I feared being involved in an accident. I also feared failing the road test because I had failed it a few years earlier and felt like an idiot afterwards. I would always ask myself “Why is this skill that comes so easily to others so hard for me to achieve?” and  “Is there something wrong with me because I can write a 20 page paper in 2 days and get an A on it but I can’t do left turns on busy intersections without tensing up and getting sweaty palms!” I know it’s because I am not confident in my driving abilities but I’ve overcome things that were once tough for me like speaking in front of a crowd full of people, maintaining eye contact and most recently, being honest about my feelings and learning to let go of situations that no longer helped me grow. These were challenges that I didn’t overcome easily but I was able to do it. So why does this fear of driving still plague me even after getting my license.  I kept asking this question to myself until I finally figured it out. I am afraid of dealing with things that I cannot control.

When I write a paper, I know that my grade is dependent on the work I do. If I put a lot of effort into researching and writing, I will get a good grade. If I don’t, the grade will show that. I am in control of the results. Same thing goes with socializing and being able to connect with people. If I show interest and work on my social skills, most people will have a positive response to what I am saying and pay attention. Driving is a different thing altogether. Even the best drivers get into accidents or encounter situations beyond their control. They can’t guarantee that someone else on the road hasn’t been drinking or that the rain won’t hinder them from getting them where they need to go. I don’t do well with things that are completely out of my control and my mind always goes to the worse case scenario. It’s the pessimist in me that needs to fade into the background but that pessimist has been nurtured by fear. The only way to eliminate that fear is by doing the complete opposite. I need to be confident in my abilities but most importantly, I need to have faith.

I have discussed conquering my fears in the past by believing in yourself and going as hard as you can to achieve your goals but I never mentioned the role that faith plays in overcome fear. In the Bible it says “Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” In other words, you have to believe in something even though it may not be visible to you at that very moment. I have to believe in myself and my abilities even though I am not able to predict the future to know that everything will work out. People step out on faith all the time and make extraordinary things happen. Why should something as simple as driving be any different? I am working on strengthening my faith every day by praying and meditating, saying  positive affirmations and understanding that everything happens the way its supposed to and certain things are inevitable. The future is unknown but as long as I step out one with and emit positive energy into the atmosphere, that same positive energy will bounce back to me. This applies to all facets of my life and it definitely will help me when I start driving.

Is there anything you are fearful of that is hindering you from becoming the best version of yourself? Are you taking any steps to conquer that fear and letting faith take over? I have learned that fear limits you but faith is limitless and for me to get to where I need to be in life, my faith has to be stronger than any lingering fear or doubt in my heart. I always say this but I am a work in progress and everyday is a new day to learn something new and make sure that I get out of my own way!

Make sure you tune in next Wednesday October 26th at 8pm EST because I’ll be live on Facebook! The topic is “Eliminating Limitations” and this whole thing on fear vs. faith is a big part of it. Looking forward to chatting with everyone:)

 

Check back here on Wednesday for my next post and have an amazing day and always remember to love and live luxuriously!

The Power of Love

love quote 1Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

1 Corinthians 13 4-7

At the beginning of 2014, I told  myself that I would make a solid effort to change my life. I started working out (doing the 30 day ab challenge and 30 day squat challenge which I will talk about in detail tomorrow) as well as trying to eat healthier (I realized that if I am going to keep it up, I gotta start cooking more) but I know that lasting change starts from within. I have a way of being very negative and critical when it comes to others but mainly when dealing with my own insecurities and missteps in life. Sometimes I take my negative energy and spread it around without even realizing it. Sometimes no words need to be said because a person’s actions say it all. I wasn’t in a positive space so I would isolate myself from others, flake when making plans and start throwing a pity party and criticize those who didn’t understand where I was coming from. What I failed to realize is that I wasn’t emitting positive energy into my space and I was blocking the positive energy from others as well so all I saw was the negative in every situation. Sometimes you don’t even have to be the one sharing the negativity but if you are around it and you encourage it or don’t do anything to prevent it, you are just as guilty as the source of the negative energy. I realized that after a conversation that I had last night and I started feeling bitter and resentful towards the person who stood by and let  others bring the negativity in. After thinking about it today, I realized that you can’t meet negative energy with negative energy. Positive energy has to be in place for it to cancel out.Just like you can’t fight hate with hate. You have to confront hate with love. It is harder to show love to someone who has hurt you but many times, those are the people who need it the most. I am not saying go around and hug everyone that has done you wrong but wishing the same amount of negativity that they have brought in your life will only weigh you down. In my situation, I will continue to be there for the person that has disappointed me because I know that at least one of us will benefit from it in time. If the negativity persists and gets to be too much, I will fade into the background but I will try my best not to surrender to the ways of the past. Most importantly, I will do my best to show love because true love in any relationship has the power to comfort, protect and most importantly, help the healing process. I love all of you and I thank you for your encouraging words and support.

love.laugh.live.life