Good Morning! The topic of today’s post came to me kind of suddenly but not really because it’s been on my mind for awhile now but I wasn’t sure how to articulate my thoughts into a comprehensible post. I had a long phone chat with my friend Kimmy over the weekend (hey girl!) and we were talking about how our thoughts and words carry so much weight and that you have to be careful yet intentional with how you think and what you say. Thoughts and words have power and you attract what you put out into the world (law of attraction and all of that!) so be mindful of what you say and do. I realize that even though I may say I want things to be a certain way, my thoughts do not match my words and as a result, the actions behind those words do not usually come to fruition. I always thought that it was solely based on my lack of confidence at times but after reflecting on our conversation as well as a previous conversation with my therapist, I finally figured out what the issue was that was holding me back from greatness and what needed to change in order to let go and move forward.
After talking to my therapist a few weeks back, I realized that I have a tendency to ‘catastrophize’ everything. By catastrophize, I mean that I always think about the worst things that can happen in every situation. If I go on a job interview, I think “What if I can’t demonstrate that I am the ideal candidate for the position?” or “What if I appear to be incompetent?” I’ve done in in the past when dating especially when things didn’t go my way. I’d think to myself, “What if he leaves as a result of our argument?” I always think about the ‘worst case scenario’ and that pessimism seems to linger in various parts of my life. I realize that my mother is the queen of catastrophizing and even though I know that many disappointing moments in her life have led her to always think the worst about people and situations, I also feel that her negative thoughts attract negative emotions and as a result, it is a never ending cycle of dread and fear. Some of those behaviors have trickled down to me and although I am not as pessimistic as my mother, I know that when bad things do happen, I have a tendency to let them consume me instead of dealing with my emotions in that moment but allowing them to pass and learn from what mistakes have occurred. My biggest fears are my fear of failure and fear of death and although I cannot control the latter, I can deal with my fear of failure by changing my perspective, Instead of seeing a failed job interview as a failure or loss, I can use the situation as a learning experience on what not to do. Instead of being fearful of losing someone I really care about based off of an argument, I should focus on the honesty of my words and never to minimize my thoughts or feelings even if it means losing someone in the process. If we aren’t able to get past the argument, that in itself should tell me all that I need to know. In other words, instead of thinking about the ‘worst case scenario’, I needed to shift my thinking to the ‘best case scenario’ and let my actions follow suit.
By thinking about the ‘best case scenario’, I will enter a situation with a positive mindset because I will be able to see the bright side of any outcome and use it to push me closer to my goals instead of seeing the experience as another way of holding me back. There are many things that are out of my control but I can control the way I view the situation and most importantly, how I respond to it. I’m going to try this ‘Best Case Scenario’ mindset approach and I will be sure to let you know how it goes. I believe that it’s definitely going to improve my life going forward 😉 (see what I did there!)
What do you do to ‘decatastrophize’ a situation? I’d love to hear your thoughts on this so leave them in the comments below or on my social media (IG:@amoreluxe_ FB: Angela Cherai) so I can learn a few things from you guys! My next post should be up on Wednesday but if not then, I’ll definitely have something for you on Friday. I hope everyone has an amazing week and until the next time, always remember to love and live luxuriously!