New Year’s Eve Reflections

Trey, vacays and learning how to truly live: 2017 in a nutshell!

Good Evening! It has been over 6 months since my last post and there is a very good reason for that: I really didn’t know what I wanted to do with “Amore Luxe” or if I even wanted to blog anymore. I feel like I have been pretty honest with you guys as it relates to what’s going on in my life and my feelings about everything but for the past couple of years, it just feels like I have gone through the motions and living life with no real passion or purpose. I still wanted to help others be the best versions of themselves by sharing my stories and experiences but because I wasn’t in a good place mentally, I was just going with the flow instead of finding new experiences that would help me feel more confident in myself and give me the passion and fulfillment that I craved.  My full-time job as a Director of a daycare center wasn’t what I envisioned for myself and as a result, I felt like a failure.  I wasn’t being an entrepreneur I feel that I am destined to be because I felt stuck in a 9-5 position where I wasn’t growing or evolving. This brought about negative thoughts and feeling and because I was miserable, I wasn’t able to be the best version of myself for the children. parents and staff that depended on me. I would come home emotionally drained and dread doing the same thing the following days ahead.I knew that there was more to life than what I was experiencing and an epiphany moment right before Thanksgiving was the catalyst that helped me restart my life in a different direction and  led to me make a few life altering decisions.

I thought about where I was in life, where I wanted to be and what steps I would need to take to get there. I was at a job that I stumbled into instead of working hard to get to that position and while I was a diligent and reliable employee, that passion and purpose that I desperately needed wasn’t there and when I realized that, I knew I had to move on.  I decided that December 22nd would be my last day because I didn’t want to start 2018 in the same space physically or mentally. After making that step, I knew I would have to figure out how to supplement unemployment with other sources of income. I manage social media platforms for businesses on the side and help college students with their essays/terms/thesis papers and plan on promoting these hustles more because it is something that is flexible and beneficial as it relates to what I want to do with my life. The last step was getting my mind right. I lost my paternal grandmother in October and her death added to the deaths of my other grandparents and father in the past few years was a breaking point emotionally. I just felt like I had no control over anything in life and didn’t know how to properly cope with the fear of that. I finally womaned up (lol) and decided to go to therapy. While I never judged anyone that chose to seek counseling, I always thought that I would have to be suicidal or at rock bottom in general to even consider talking to someone about my issues. I don’t have a problem sharing my issues with others but I always thought that in itself was therapy and I could fix things by just thinking positively and hoping for the best. When that failed time and time again, I felt like therapy was the only way out because I didn’t want things to get any worse than they already were before I got myself together. It turns out that therapy was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. I am able to talk to an objective source about my life and my issues and receive feedback from someone who knows what they are talking about and does not judge based on someone’s current circumstances. My therapist helped me understand that a lot of my issues stem from things I never really dealt with in the past. I would talk about whatever was bothering me with someone and then that would be it. I would push it in the back of my mind and try not to think about it instead of tackling my emotions head on and being okay with things not being okay. I hate silence unless I am reading or doing work so sitting there for a minute or two and absorbing what had been said. It was a different approach to handling my issues and it has proven itself to helpful in all areas of my life.

Now that I’m in a better space mentally, I want to also work on the physical so I plan on joining a gym within the next couple of days. I feel like this is the perfect time to do so not only because of all the New Year’s promotions going on but I have the free time to commit to it and can also work on eating healthy to make sure that I will be in the best shape of my life! I’ll be honest with you guys, I am still unsure of exactly what direction I want to go with the site but it will still be confidence based but I’m in more of a vlogging than blogging space so expect more Snapchat/Instagram videos that will be reposted on here in addition to live chats and a podcast that I’m working on with a friend of mine 😉

2017 was a transition year for me and I am looking forward to the new beginnings that 2018 has in store for my life. Thank you so much for your support and always remember to love and live luxuriously!

 

 

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Wisdom Wednesday: Turn Your Dreams Into Reality 

  
Good Afternoon! After a week of being on an emotional roller coaster as well as in slight discomfort from getting 3 teeth pulled, (ouch!) I told myself that I would make a post on Wisdom Wednesday that would push me forward and give myself and others the motivation to go after the things they want in life. While I was on Facebook yesterday, I saw the quote posted above and I realized that as much as I dream and visualize the things I want in my life, I haven’t stepped out of the “dream” state of mind. 

Dreams can’t come true without the action that goes behind them so even though I am physically awake, my dreams are dormant because I haven’t been pushing myself to go after the things I want with everything I have. I have accomplished a lot in my (almost) 30 years of living but I’m not content with living off of past successes and achievements. Life is a challenge but the things that are really worth having are worth the pain, struggle and sacrifice. I’ve already taken the first step by being able to create my own dream but now I have to take a huge leap forward and be prepared for whatever comes my way. In the end, I want to be able to see those visions in my head in real life and not only in the fantasies that linger in my mind while sleeping.  I can’t wait to see what transpires:) 

Always remember to love and live luxuriously! 

Pushing Past The Pain

 

Good Morning! One of my biggest challenges has been to find the motivation and willpower to keep pushing through all the stumbling blocks and obstacles in my way. From dealing with my father’s death to feeling stagnant in my professional career, there’s been a lot of mental challenges that have been difficult to overcome. Giving up isn’t an option for me but since there is no set plan on how to be successful as it relates to my dreams and goals, sometimes I feel like I’m running around in circles and not really getting anywhere. I had a talk with a friend of mine last night and he made me realize that some people aren’t built for this type of lifestyle. To be an entrepreneur, you have to be ready for whatever comes your way. Many times, that means that you have to be prepared to have moments of failure. It is inevitable when you are taking chances and cannot always accurately predict the outcome but for the people who let their faith in their dreams overpower their fears, being an entrepreneur is worth taking the risk. This does not only apply to those with the entrepreneur spirit. For anyone who feels like they have encountered disappointment after disappointment and wants to give up on the things that matter most, just know that if you dig a little deeper and push a little harder, everything you want will fall into place. It isn’t an overnight process because nothing worth having come easily but the risk is worth the reward. My message to anyone going through something in their lives is to push past your pain, fear, disappointment or whatever is holding you back because you will never reach the finish line towards your dreams if you stop running altogether.  Instead, let’s choose to run together now so we can fly later😀 I refuse to settle for anything less!
I’m still working out the details for my webchat in September so stay tuned for more info coming soon! 

Always remember to love and live luxuriously! 

Breaking Bad Habits

Good Morning folks! For the last month or so, I’ve had a pretty bad case of writer’s block. I couldn’t think of anything to write about that didn’t sound repetitive or depressing and I told myself that I wouldn’t post anything that I consider mediocre or second-rate. I want all of my blog posts to show insight into what is going on in my life and hopefully be helpful and relatable to others. After the conversation I had with a friend yesterday where we discussed our fears and dreams, I realized that our biggest obstacles are not those that come from outside influences but instead the mental roadblocks we create in our mind. If you say you can or can’t do something, either way, you are correct.

You are the only one that is in control of your thoughts, feelings and actions and although we cannot predict the future and may not be able to manipulate all things to our favor, we have the power to control how we respond to these actions and behaviors. For every action there is usually a reaction and how we react can decide the course of our future. Unfortunately,  previous negative experiences can create bad mental habits that can be difficult to break. Experts have said that it takes about 66 days to break bad habits and create new ones. Whether it’s a nervous habit such as biting your nails or something more addictive like smoking, these habits start in the mind. You have to first address the mental issues going on inside your brain before the physical changes can occur. I am conscious of what my bad habits are (procrastination, not following through on plans) and I’ve realized that fear is the controlling factor that brought about these bad habits.

Fear of failure and rejection are why I keep making excuses and put off things that I feel will take me to the next level. Fear is a self-defense mechanism to protect us from danger that we sense whether we are conscious of it or not. This is normal but when we let the fears that we create run our lives instead of conquering them, they lead to bad mental habits which can lead to bad physical ones. Along with fear, there is jealousy, denial, pride and countless others that can bring the worst out of people. Excessive drinking that can lead to depression and isolation may be because of not coming to terms with a tragic situation in someone’s past. Road rage may stem from being taught that the only way to deal with frustration and anger is confrontation. Whatever the habit, there is always an underlying cause of it and acknowledging what that cause is and managing it is essential for success. Focus on your journey and understand that change is inevitable but how you handle the changes is a testament to who you really are.

I wish everyone the best of luck in breaking bad habits and always remember to love and live luxuriously!