Pretty Hurts

Perfection is a disease of a nation. It’s the soul that needs the surgery

Beyonce-Pretty Hurts


Last week, I posted quotes that stood out in my mind and because I have listened to Beyonce’s latest album nonstop, this lyric from her song “Pretty Hurts” stood out to me especially since many of my posts focus on having confidence. I was talking to my friend Kimmy  last night and we started talking about R&B artist Dawn Richard. I had the pleasure of interviewing her at the beginning of last year after her show at SOB’s in NYC(check out the interview here and she was so sweet and honest. As far as looks go, she was beautiful in my eyes.  Her brown skin was flawless , her haircut was on point and she had this glow about her that seemed to draw everyone in. I was so happy for her and the artist that she was becoming. I felt that she had it altogether and knew who she was so when I was on her Instagram page a few weeks ago and saw her post a picture of someone who I assumed was a model, I thought nothing of it because I figured she liked this particular woman’s look/style. Imagine how I felt when I started reading the comments and realized that she had posted a picture of herself. I was in shock and not in a good way. Although the woman in the picture was beautiful, she wasn’t the woman with the full face and smooth brown skin that I remembered interviewing a year earlier. I thought  “Maybe its Photoshop gone too far” but then I looked at pictures she posted after the first one that didn’t seem to be altered in any way and it was then that I felt that another pretty girl had given in to the pressure from the media/society.

I feel that people have a right to do what makes them happy so if plastic surgery is what works for you, then that is cool but it bothers me when people say they love who they are but then change the traits that make them unique. I feel that flaws are beautiful and give a person character. Like my eyes are huge but they stand out and I’m a petite girl for the most part but the changes that have happened to my body over the last few years have been natural not because of cosmetic enhancements. I know its hard to feel beautiful at all time especially when you see something in others that you want but giving in to the pressure would make you blend in instead of standing out. It is better to be a first-rate version of yourself than a second-rate version of someone else.

Always follow your heart and do what is right for YOU and not anyone else.

Plastic Surgery: Yay or Nay?

I was talking to my girl Robyn (who will be co-hosting with me on a future show really soon!) about being confident with your appearance and the challenges we faced growing up and learning to love ourselves in the process. I started thinking to myself “What would I like to change about myself physically to be completely satisfied with myself?” I always had an overbite but braces made it less noticeable and closed my once prominent gap so my smile hasn’t been a major issue. I was always the skinny girl in middle school and high school and was 107 pounds at my lowest but within the last few years, I’ve filled out dramatically so that really isn’t an issue anymore either. I do want to tone but I can do that by going to the gym a few times a week and eating healthier but none of these “changes” seemed extreme to me so I thought about what it would be like to take the next step and receive cosmetic surgery. I could receive veneers to fix my teeth, a butt lift to get the perfect booty and liposuction to get the perfect stomach and then I would be happy right? Heidi Montag (the woman in the video) claims she is happy with the 10 procedures she had done to change her look so it seems like the logical thing to do if you have the money right? It would seem that way but now I am not so sure.

I consider myself to be an attractive woman. I’ve been told that I’m cute or pretty many times and when I get dolled up, I feel great at first but even in those moments, I can find a flaw that can distort the image that I see staring back at me in the mirror. Plastic surgery can these “flaws” but what it can’t fix is my confidence overall. These issues are deeper than what people see on the outside and stem from how I viewed myself growing up and how I related to others. I would have to deal with these issues first before ever considering going under the knife. I don’t believe in quick fixes so I know that fixing my tummy or booty won’t bring instant confidence and the changes may be damaging to my health so I would have to live with these decisions for the rest of my life. I believe that to feel confident in all aspects of your life, you have to be confident in your appearance so if plastic surgery will help in your journey to positive self worth, then go for it! My advice is to focus on why you want the changes first and work on an “inner makeover” before you take the next step and change what’s on the outside. As long as you are true to yourself, you can’t go wrong!