#FearlessFriday: Learning How To Take (Constructive) Criticism

Image result for constructive criticism quotesGood Morning Lovelies! Back in 2016, I planned on doing a #FearlessFriday post every Friday where I would share something that I was fearful of or that held me back from reaching my full potential. It could be something as extreme as conquering my fear of riding on airplanes without having a mini panic attack before takeoff or something as minor as going outside of my comfort zone and trying something new like online dating for example (check out my previous post to read more about that!). Today I wanted to discuss something that has held me back from being the best version of myself because of my own personal insecurities. The thing is, I do not take criticism well AT ALL. Like its to the point where I become defensive or embarrassed and lose the motivation and passion to do what I initially set out to do. At first, I didn’t understand why I was this way towards people who were just trying to help me out. As I thought about it and went deeper into my past, I realized that criticism for me was a way of pointing out my flaws and failures which in turn meant that I wasn’t worthy of whatever it is that I desired.

It all goes back to having low self-esteem as a child and teenager and although I have grown and changed drastically since then, some of the doubts and triggers linger from those times that create doubt and wariness as an adult. Back then when I was picked on, I took it personally not realizing that kids prey on weakness and can sense it from a mile away. My insecurities were a weakness that held me back from speaking my mind and embracing everything that makes me, me quirks and all. Even though I learned that self-confidence is essential to do well in life and to gain respect from others, constructive criticism still felt like a punch in the gut and instead of using critiques like “You need to post more content that will appeal to a wider demographic.” or “Your inconsistencies with your blog come across as laziness and you need to do better” as motivation and encouragement, I looked at it from a pessimistic point of view as me not being good enough. These critiques and suggestions that came from my friends were only meant to help but instead I turned it into a ‘woe is me’ party and didn’t heed their advice. Needless to say when the light bulb finally went on in my head, a lot of time had been wasted that could have been used to create content and achieve my goals. When you know better, you do better and now that I get it, I’m going full speed ahead!

Now let me be clear, constructive criticism is totally different from being negative, petty or just a certified hater. If someone you know is being critical just because of their personal preferences, do not offer any solutions to the issue that they are being critical about or are coming from a place of negativity, anger or resentment, that is NOT constructive criticism but is destructive and toxic. Limit or avoid these kinds of people because they will only bring you down in the end. Constructive criticism should be helpful and beneficial to your life and if the critique doesn’t offer a solution or valid reason for your problem or concern, you might want to take a second look at the person that is offering their unwanted opinion.

To my friends, thanks for always providing me with love and support but most importantly, being truthful with me about things that I needed to improve. The truth can hurt but the constructive criticism has made me stronger and more determined than ever and for that, I am forever grateful 😘

 

I will be posting a book review from one of my favorite bloggers/motivational speakers on Monday so stay tuned for that! Have a great weekend and remember to love and live luxuriously!

 

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Passion and Patience 

Good Afternoon! I have been racking my brain on what I should write about. Writer’s block is no joke and it’s been a struggle but I thought about the things that have been heavy on my mind lately and I realize that I’ve been frustrated that I’m not living the life of my dreams yet. I know what I want out of life and the work that it will take to get there but it’s been tough just wishing and hoping that things will work out. That’s when I have my “aha” moment as Oprah likes to call it. If I’m actually putting in the work, I won’t have time to think about what I don’t have and what I’m not getting out of life. In order for me to want to do the work, it has to be something I’m passionate about and something I’m willing to wait for because I know that it will come true in time. 

Passion and patience lead to greatness and I feel that both is needed for me to make all the visions on my vision board a reality. I can’t let pressure overwhelm me and as I stated in a previous post, I have to take things one day at a time. As long as I don’t lose sight of those goals and remain confident and excited about them, they will come to fruition. Every day is a new beginning so let this day be the start of something amazing! Be sure to keep me updated on your journey:) 

Always remember to love and live luxuriously!

Switching Things Up 

 

Good Morning! I have had an interesting week  that has brought about a lot of changes. The excitement for the 30 Days of Confidence Challenge” as well as the “Confidence Campaign” overall has been amazing and I’m so appreciative for all of the likes and reposts that I’ve seen each day. I’m in the process of reworking my post content as well as the brand “Amore Luxe” overall. The foundation will always be based off of having confidence in yourself will have a positive impact on all areas of your life but I want to switch things up a bit so I’m falling back from the confidence challenges so I can bring something else that will excite and enlighten my followers. I’ll be working on it over the weekend so make sure you check back in with me next week to see exactly what I have in store 🙂

Much love to all of you and remember to love and live luxuriously!

The Definition of a “Hater”

quote-about-judging-people

Ever since I could remember, I’ve heard the term “hater” being used in many ways for a number of reasons. I think that a hater can be defined as “A person who criticizes another person’s physical appearance, possessions attitude etc. because of jealousy/envy towards that person”. Many people feed into the critical aspect of “hating”  but tend to forget about the envy/jealousy aspect and accept/condone the negativity. I feel that this happens because bringing someone down to your level is easier than trying to uplift them and use them as motivation to bring yourself to a higher level in your life. As the saying goes “Misery loves company” and a lot of miserable people in the world that put more work in spreading negative energy instead of changing their mindset and attempting to see the good in everyone and everything.

I have to admit that I’ve had  “hater” moments especially when a person possessed something I desired or thought I wanted. Instead of acknowledging the positive attributes in the person that I wanted to have, I would look for the imperfections and highlight those instead. Doing these things time and time again didn’t give anything useful to my life and in fact kept me at a standstill. It was in one of these “hating” moments that I realized that I had to change the way I perceived others because I was only hurting myself. Now I’m not saying that I love everyone and everything because I don’t but to those people and things I don’t care for, I try to not to dwell on them and instead embrace the positive qualities in a person. I don’t urge hate towards others or to myself. Some people say “My haters are my motivators” but I don’t want to use negativity as a driving force to become a better version of myself. I embrace the people who bring positivity and happiness in life and are a good example for others. Only light can end darkness and I want my inner light to shine bright and bring out that same glow in others. I hope this post can be one of my shining moments 🙂

Always remember to love and live luxuriously!