Tag Archives: quotes

03.14.18
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Shattering My Rose Colored Glasses

Good Morning! I am back with another post like I promised (go me!) and this topic came naturally to me. I started thinking about what “epiphany” moment has had the biggest impact on my life in 2018 so far and I realized it was when I finally got through my head that just because I see the potential in someone and want more from that person, that doesn’t mean that the potential will come to fruition.  When it comes to others thoughts and actions, I need to see them for who they are and not who I want or imagine them to be. In other words, I need to take off the rose-colored glasses that are blocking my vision and my grip on reality. Before I discuss my epiphany moment, let me give you guys some back story!

There was this guy I was seeing for a minute ( 4 years to be exact!) before I broke things off at the end of 2015. I’ve talked about him in earlier posts so I won’t get into all of that but we wanted different things and I didn’t wanna settle I ended it. I spent 4 years of my time with him in a “situationship” that he was content with but as I approached 30, I wanted more so I ended it and thought he would just disappear or stay cool from a distance.  That’s not what he wanted so he was persistent as far as keeping the lines of communication open with me for all of 2016.  Finally in the summer of 2017, I figured I would give him a chance on a trial basis (well trial basis in my mind!) since his persistence meant that he may be ready for the changes that I wanted to happen in our relationship.  I told myself that I would give him 2 months to show me that things would be different and even though I knew better, I still had hope well more like I was still wearing my rose-colored glasses and wanted to see something more than what was really there. 2 months passed and things started going back to the way they were and I WAS NOT having it! I cut it off as soon as I felt like we were slipping back into the same routine and we started this pattern of him lingering around again. Finally a few weeks ago when I last saw him, I tested him (again this test was never said aloud!) to see if there was a glimmer of hope (those rose-colored glasses had me creating delusions of grandeur lol) and asked him for a simple favor that he couldn’t do. Something that would show that I was a priority instead of an option and after all the persistence and waiting around, he still couldn’t match up to the potential that I foolishly insisted was there. It was then in that moment that my rose-colored glasses were shattered and even though he couldn’t see them break, the actions that followed (me politely walking him out) showed that this time, I could see him for who he really was and although he isn’t a terrible guy, he is definitely not the guy for me. I was no longer blinded by the “potential” or “hope” that hindered me from moving on completely and since that day, I’ve never looked back.

In that “epiphany”moment, I felt liberated and it didn’t take me crying my eyes out or going through a long drawn out conversation where I remix what I’ve said in the past to try to convince him that my feelings were valid. None of it mattered anymore because when I realized I wasn’t valued the way I should have been, everything else was irrelevant.  I didn’t discuss my issues with my friends because they weren’t wearing the glasses so their vision was crystal clear. You can’t fully see things from another person’s perspective with the rose-colored glasses on. The glasses give you a false sense of reality. This doesn’t just apply to relationships but for any situation when you make excuses or pretend that things aren’t as bad as they are. The truth is distorted, your vision is blocked and when this occurs, you become stagnant and passive when you should be moving forward and assert yourself especially when it comes to things in your life that you have control over. Shattering the glasses can take time but when you do, you will realize how much power you have over your own life and will be able to make better decisions in the future.  With the destruction of those rose-colored glasses led the creation of a new life for myself. One where not only am I a priority to someone else but most importantly, making myself a priority in my life.

One of the first things on my list of doing right by myself is to constantly promote Amore Luxe Media (see what I did there!) If you haven’t heard about my new social media company, scroll down to the previous post or click on the Amore Luxe Media tab at the top of the page to find out all about it. I hope you all make decisions that help you shatter the rose-colored glasses that may have blocked your true vision to your purpose! Please be sure to like/comment/share and look out for my next post coming Friday 🙂 Have a Happy Hump Day and always remember to love and live luxuriously!

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02.26.18
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Black Panther Review *Spoilers Included*

Good Morning everyone! I know its been close to two months but I’ve been working on my side hustle “Amore Luxe Media” that I will be discussing within the next few days. Working on that project has taken up most of my time but I said in my last post that I would start posting more content so I’m gonna do better in 2018 I promise! I figured I’d start this year on a high note and what better way to do that than to discuss the year’s most anticipated movie. I am talking about Black Panther of course! I have been dying to see this movie for over a year now and when it was released in theaters 10 days ago, I made sure that I had the perfect seats and that I purchased 3D tickets because I had to experience Wakanda in all its glory and  I am very happy with my decision.  Black Panther was such an amazing film that I ended up seeing it a second time. I wanted to wait at least a week to discuss my favorite parts but I couldn’t wait any longer so if you haven’t seen it, close this tab now because I’m about to tell it all or at least the best parts lmao

 

spoiler alert

First off Wakanda is such a beautiful world.The mountains and waterfalls are what dreams are made of! I wish it was a real place so I could save my coins to go visit! The only thing that competed with the scenery were the people. I loved the different tribes that were represented and their attire and I enjoyed knowing that the beautiful people on the screen with their rich brown skin were being portrayed in a positive light and were a part of the most advanced nation in the WORLD! Now when have Black people ever been associated with anything remotely close to that level of magnificence in mainstream media???NEVER that’s what but seeing them reminded me of how great we are and showed the rest of the word that there is more to Black culture than slaves, maids and gangsters. The fact that the rest of the world underestimated the power and intelligence of Wakanda and thought it was just another third world country made it even better.I like being seen as the underdog because people will never see what’s coming when you finally decide to showcase your talents and abilities!

love their brother/sister relationship…couldn’t find the “What are those?!?” gif so I settled for this one lol

Now onto my fave characters: Princess Shuri is absolutely amazing! She was my favorite character because she was intelligent, witty and funny and black girls usually aren’t portrayed as such in mainstream media. She brought out the playful side of T’Challa who is normally very serious and stoic and made him more likable. She saved the CIA agent’s life (while reminding him that he was a colonizer lol) and ended up being his boss sort of speak when its usually the other way around in most movies. She had heart and hella jokes and even though I’ve never read the comic books, I’m sure Letitia Wright did the character justice.

Now my second fave character is a toss up between Okoye (played by Danai Gurira) and Erik Killmonger (played by Michael B. Jordan) Okoye is the definition of a strong, fierce, loyal bad ass woman. She wasn’t afraid to speak her mind and she didn’t succumb to a man because of love and valued loyalty and honor above all else. And she’s an amazing fighter and dare I say it, better than Black Panther when it comes to pure martial art like skills! I bet he couldn’t beat her without his suit on…I would put money on it :p Now as far as Killmonger goes, this was some of Michael B. Jordan’s best work yet. I was never impressed with him as an actor but he really committed himself to this role and I loved his fire and passion even though Killmonger’s approach was all wrong. The line at the end where he said “Bury me in the ocean with my ancestors who jumped from ships, ‘cause they knew death was better than bondage.” was so profound and prolific all I could do was say “Damn!” Like even while dying, he still remained true to himself and his beliefs and I respect that. M’Baku who was the leader of the Jabari tribe was funny too and really came through in the end as far as saving T’Challa’s life and protecting the throne. T’Challa/Black Panther and Nakia were good too and their relationship was kinda cute but they didn’t stand out as much as I thought they would…there’s always hope for more character development in   the sequel fingers crossed

Okoye in all of her fierceness/badassery!

Okay so I have to talk about the bomb that was dropped on us courtesy of Sterling K. Brown (Randall from This is Us). Now I knew that Sterling was in the movie but I didn’t realize that he would play such a pivotal role as King T’Challa’s uncle Prince N’Jobu. We find out towards the middle of the movie that N’Jobu was killed by T’Challa’s father T’Chaka,  the former king who died in Captain America: Civil War (I only watched the scenes with Black Panther’s character so I could understand the back story better lol). That was crazy enough but then we find out that the “villain” Killmonger is actually N’Jobu’s son who was abandoned so that T’Challa’s father’s secret wouldn’t be discovered…Mind Blown! That made the plot so much more interesting because it went from brother vs. brother to cousin vs. cousin and two points of view as far as how to advance as a nation. T’Challa believed in isolation as a way to protect Wakanda and its people and Killmonger believed in killing and conquering to help Black people who are struggling around the world. Killmonger’s passion along with Nakia’s reasoning influenced T’Challa to abandon the traditional way of thinking and share Wakanda’s resources with the rest of the world. Looking forward to seeing a sequel (if I keep putting it out in the universe, I can will it to happen lol) and how the world responds to the fact that Wakanda is so much more than what it appeared to be.

Killmonger was militant and violent but I still emphasized with him…crazy right!

I hope that seeing a Black Superhero with a majority black cast will show Hollywood that Black led films do well in the states as well as internationally. Black Panther has broken all kinds of records and has grossed more than 500 million worldwide in a weeks time. Now if that isn’t showing how much the world (not just the black people in it) wants to see diversity on their screens, I don’t know what else can be done. I also look forward to seeing what Ryan Coogler (the director of Black Panther) has up his sleeve because he has shown himself to be an amazing director and visionary so I know this is only the beginning for him!

What did you think of the movie? Let me know in the comments below:)

Stay tuned for my “Amore Luxe Media” announcement and always remember to love and live luxuriously!

12.31.17
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New Year’s Eve Reflections

Trey, vacays and learning how to truly live: 2017 in a nutshell!

Good Evening! It has been over 6 months since my last post and there is a very good reason for that: I really didn’t know what I wanted to do with “Amore Luxe” or if I even wanted to blog anymore. I feel like I have been pretty honest with you guys as it relates to what’s going on in my life and my feelings about everything but for the past couple of years, it just feels like I have gone through the motions and living life with no real passion or purpose. I still wanted to help others be the best versions of themselves by sharing my stories and experiences but because I wasn’t in a good place mentally, I was just going with the flow instead of finding new experiences that would help me feel more confident in myself and give me the passion and fulfillment that I craved.  My full-time job as a Director of a daycare center wasn’t what I envisioned for myself and as a result, I felt like a failure.  I wasn’t being an entrepreneur I feel that I am destined to be because I felt stuck in a 9-5 position where I wasn’t growing or evolving. This brought about negative thoughts and feeling and because I was miserable, I wasn’t able to be the best version of myself for the children. parents and staff that depended on me. I would come home emotionally drained and dread doing the same thing the following days ahead.I knew that there was more to life than what I was experiencing and an epiphany moment right before Thanksgiving was the catalyst that helped me restart my life in a different direction and  led to me make a few life altering decisions.

I thought about where I was in life, where I wanted to be and what steps I would need to take to get there. I was at a job that I stumbled into instead of working hard to get to that position and while I was a diligent and reliable employee, that passion and purpose that I desperately needed wasn’t there and when I realized that, I knew I had to move on.  I decided that December 22nd would be my last day because I didn’t want to start 2018 in the same space physically or mentally. After making that step, I knew I would have to figure out how to supplement unemployment with other sources of income. I manage social media platforms for businesses on the side and help college students with their essays/terms/thesis papers and plan on promoting these hustles more because it is something that is flexible and beneficial as it relates to what I want to do with my life. The last step was getting my mind right. I lost my paternal grandmother in October and her death added to the deaths of my other grandparents and father in the past few years was a breaking point emotionally. I just felt like I had no control over anything in life and didn’t know how to properly cope with the fear of that. I finally womaned up (lol) and decided to go to therapy. While I never judged anyone that chose to seek counseling, I always thought that I would have to be suicidal or at rock bottom in general to even consider talking to someone about my issues. I don’t have a problem sharing my issues with others but I always thought that in itself was therapy and I could fix things by just thinking positively and hoping for the best. When that failed time and time again, I felt like therapy was the only way out because I didn’t want things to get any worse than they already were before I got myself together. It turns out that therapy was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. I am able to talk to an objective source about my life and my issues and receive feedback from someone who knows what they are talking about and does not judge based on someone’s current circumstances. My therapist helped me understand that a lot of my issues stem from things I never really dealt with in the past. I would talk about whatever was bothering me with someone and then that would be it. I would push it in the back of my mind and try not to think about it instead of tackling my emotions head on and being okay with things not being okay. I hate silence unless I am reading or doing work so sitting there for a minute or two and absorbing what had been said. It was a different approach to handling my issues and it has proven itself to helpful in all areas of my life.

Now that I’m in a better space mentally, I want to also work on the physical so I plan on joining a gym within the next couple of days. I feel like this is the perfect time to do so not only because of all the New Year’s promotions going on but I have the free time to commit to it and can also work on eating healthy to make sure that I will be in the best shape of my life! I’ll be honest with you guys, I am still unsure of exactly what direction I want to go with the site but it will still be confidence based but I’m in more of a vlogging than blogging space so expect more Snapchat/Instagram videos that will be reposted on here in addition to live chats and a podcast that I’m working on with a friend of mine 😉

2017 was a transition year for me and I am looking forward to the new beginnings that 2018 has in store for my life. Thank you so much for your support and always remember to love and live luxuriously!

 

 

06.15.17
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Eliminating Negative Energy

Good Morning! Still working on this consistent posting thing lol  but I do have something that I wanna talk about that has weighed on my mind for the past few days that I wanted to share with you guys. As I was scrolling through my Instagram feed, I stopped on a post by Cardi B of Love and Hip Hop fame (I think her posts are so entertaining so don’t judge me!) and she posted a pic of herself in a unique outfit and most of the comments were giving her praise posting things like:

girl you are working it!

beautiful!

heart emoji

big smiley emoji

kiss emoji

You get the picture!

Unfortunately, one person decided to write a comment that had nothing to do with the actual picture but choosing to comment instead on a rumor going around about her dumping a rapper she’s been seeing because he was going to charge her to be featured on a song of hers. Never mind that the rumor wasn’t true but it must have upset her so much that this was the ONLY comment that she replied to. Out of hundreds of positive comments/praise,  she chose to respond to the ONE person that brought negativity to her page and responded with anger saying something like:

“B-word” you don’t know what you’re talking about!

In that moment, I realized that many of us do the same thing on and offline and what starts out as being something positive and uplifting has turned into anger or resentment that weighs the soul down.

Instead of focusing on the “likes” or positive things happening in our lives, we choose to focus and respond to the negative; who doesn’t like us or why we don’t have this or that and dwelling on all the negative circumstances draws more negative energy our way.  You are what  you attract and instead of being concerned with that type of energy in the form of unnecessary criticism, harsh judgment or opinions that do not add to your life, focus on the people and things that make you happy and bring joy to  your day. Now I am not saying that there needs to be people who compliment you 24/7 to feed your ego or confidence but being around people who see the best in you and want the best for you is the easiest way to attract the things you want. If there are people in your life that focus more on the negative than the positive, you  may need to reevaluate these connections and find others that are like-minded and will help you in your journey to being the best version of  yourself. It is easier said than done but your peace of mind will thank you later for it;)

I’m working on being the best version of myself this summer by starting a 45 day fitness journey with a few of my friends, reading/listening to inspirational and motivational books/speeches, participating in a 90 day workshop with a group of inspiring and motivated women who also want to work on themselves and doing a bit of traveling for fun and celebration! Needless to say, I will have a lot to discuss in upcoming posts so make sure you always come back here to see what I am up to! Look forward to sharing my journey with you this summer and beyond!

Take care and always remember to love and live luxuriously!