Good Morning! I am back with another post like I promised (go me!) and this topic came naturally to me. I started thinking about what “epiphany” moment has had the biggest impact on my life in 2018 so far and I realized it was when I finally got through my head that just because I see the potential in someone and want more from that person, that doesn’t mean that the potential will come to fruition. When it comes to others thoughts and actions, I need to see them for who they are and not who I want or imagine them to be. In other words, I need to take off the rose-colored glasses that are blocking my vision and my grip on reality. Before I discuss my epiphany moment, let me give you guys some back story!
There was this guy I was seeing for a minute ( 4 years to be exact!) before I broke things off at the end of 2015. I’ve talked about him in earlier posts so I won’t get into all of that but we wanted different things and I didn’t wanna settle I ended it. I spent 4 years of my time with him in a “situationship” that he was content with but as I approached 30, I wanted more so I ended it and thought he would just disappear or stay cool from a distance. That’s not what he wanted so he was persistent as far as keeping the lines of communication open with me for all of 2016. Finally in the summer of 2017, I figured I would give him a chance on a trial basis (well trial basis in my mind!) since his persistence meant that he may be ready for the changes that I wanted to happen in our relationship. I told myself that I would give him 2 months to show me that things would be different and even though I knew better, I still had hope well more like I was still wearing my rose-colored glasses and wanted to see something more than what was really there. 2 months passed and things started going back to the way they were and I WAS NOT having it! I cut it off as soon as I felt like we were slipping back into the same routine and we started this pattern of him lingering around again. Finally a few weeks ago when I last saw him, I tested him (again this test was never said aloud!) to see if there was a glimmer of hope (those rose-colored glasses had me creating delusions of grandeur lol) and asked him for a simple favor that he couldn’t do. Something that would show that I was a priority instead of an option and after all the persistence and waiting around, he still couldn’t match up to the potential that I foolishly insisted was there. It was then in that moment that my rose-colored glasses were shattered and even though he couldn’t see them break, the actions that followed (me politely walking him out) showed that this time, I could see him for who he really was and although he isn’t a terrible guy, he is definitely not the guy for me. I was no longer blinded by the “potential” or “hope” that hindered me from moving on completely and since that day, I’ve never looked back.
In that “epiphany”moment, I felt liberated and it didn’t take me crying my eyes out or going through a long drawn out conversation where I remix what I’ve said in the past to try to convince him that my feelings were valid. None of it mattered anymore because when I realized I wasn’t valued the way I should have been, everything else was irrelevant. I didn’t discuss my issues with my friends because they weren’t wearing the glasses so their vision was crystal clear. You can’t fully see things from another person’s perspective with the rose-colored glasses on. The glasses give you a false sense of reality. This doesn’t just apply to relationships but for any situation when you make excuses or pretend that things aren’t as bad as they are. The truth is distorted, your vision is blocked and when this occurs, you become stagnant and passive when you should be moving forward and assert yourself especially when it comes to things in your life that you have control over. Shattering the glasses can take time but when you do, you will realize how much power you have over your own life and will be able to make better decisions in the future. With the destruction of those rose-colored glasses led the creation of a new life for myself. One where not only am I a priority to someone else but most importantly, making myself a priority in my life.
One of the first things on my list of doing right by myself is to constantly promote Amore Luxe Media (see what I did there!) If you haven’t heard about my new social media company, scroll down to the previous post or click on the Amore Luxe Media tab at the top of the page to find out all about it. I hope you all make decisions that help you shatter the rose-colored glasses that may have blocked your true vision to your purpose! Please be sure to like/comment/share and look out for my next post coming Friday 🙂 Have a Happy Hump Day and always remember to love and live luxuriously!